I was lounging on the couch last night, reading a book, watching television, and working on a knitting project. Out of what seemed like nowhere, B started talking about going away on a 'grown-up only' vacation (an all inclusive resort somewhere warm).
B does his dreaming on the computer. He looks up vacations, cars, motorcycles, and many other things that he would love to have, but we cannot afford. Last night, he says we can go to the Dominican Republic (again) in the spring for a week for less than $2000.
My instant response was, "We can't afford that." Which we can't. But I got to thinking. All the goal setting that I've been doing has been pretty much about what I think that we want. I've had almost no input from B. He agrees that yes, we should have Essential Emergeny Expenses saved, and yes, we should start putting money aside if we would like to own our own home in the next five years. He really hasn't had much input other than that.
I'd like for him to become more involved in the finances, so that he can see on paper why we can't afford a vacation. Actually we can afford that vacation, but it would deplete almost all of our savings, and I'd prefer to have money at the ready should we be unable to meet our financial obligations for a given month or two.
It seems my priorities are about saving and his priorities are about spending. Or so it seems.
I think it's time the two of us sat down for a 'financial meeting', to talk about where we are, how far we've come, and where we like to go from this point on. We need to get our priorities in alignment with one another.
Savings/planned spending goals to include in this discussion are:
- Essential Emergency Expenses: how much to have before we can switch our focus to something else.
- RRSP account: funding of my account and opening one for him.
- Xmas account: what our cap will be for this year, and how much to deposit monthly for next year.
- House Fund: making a plan to have us in our own home in five years time.
- Family vacation account: two weeks at a cottage on the lake next summer-how much $ and when to have it by.
- Grown-Up vacation: develop a plan for when, where and how much $ to save.
- Debt Free Day: decide where this fits into our overall game plan.
- Future wedding: this one is still falls to the bottom of the list, but it is there.
- Auto Fund: our vehicles will eventually need repair and replacement, so we should be saving for this eventuality.
- ??: maybe B has goals that I don't even know about. Won't know until I ask.
Have you talked with your spouse or significant other about goals? How did you prioitize them?
My husband and I have been married for 10 years, and we never went on a vacation, until this year. We just simply couldn't afford it. How could we justify a $3000 vacation when we had a hefty mortgage, maxed out credit cards, and massive debt on our line of credit?? We didn't even talk about a vacation, until we paid everything off (except the mortgage). We went to Jamaica this past April - and let me tell you, we enjoyed every second of it because we knew that the vacation was paid for in cash and we had no consumer debt to go back home to.
ReplyDeleteI just don't think vacations are reasonable when someone has debt.