Dealing with Life and Death

Life: 

This week, I've had a little girl at home with a fever for each of the last 3 days. Earlier on this morning (around 3 a.m.), she actually begged me to take her to a doctor because, as she put it, "I feel like I'm dying". I checked her temp in the dark, and thought something was wrong with the thermometer because it read 39.7 Celsius. I turned on the hall light, and took her temp again. This time it read 40.0 Celsius. Good lord I stripped her down, applied cold cloths, and fed her more children's Advil. I stayed awake for another hour or so, waiting for her temp to drop to something a bit more tolerable before I went back to bed. I worry because there is no other symptoms like vomiting, diarrhea, just a little cough and a bit of a runny nose.

I worked a bit on Monday from one of my side gigs, and hopefully I should make a wee bit from that hour long meeting. I've been thinking a lot about multiple streams of income, and have come to the conclusion that my side gigs, although in the same type of industry that my business is in, qualifies as a separate stream of income (albeit a small one). Technically, we have 4 streams of income, with a couple of others that are more like a drip here and a drip there.

 Death:

Hubby and I attended the memorial service of a friend yesterday. There were a lot of people there, some of which we haven't seen in years. A sad way to make a reconnection, doncha think? There were folks of all age groups, and all walks of life in attendance. It was a fitting tribute to a young woman who made such an impression on us all.
I've been thinking about cremation as opposed to a more traditional visitation with an embalmed body present, and it has created opportunities to talk to my loved ones about what type of services they would like when their time comes. Mostly, I've talked to people about the benefits of having a 'viewing' as part of the services, and how it helps those who are left behind. I actually told hubby some of the things I want for my own service, should the unmentionable happen. I know the services are to celebrate the deceased, but in my humble opinion, they are for the living, to help them move through their grief.


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Sorry, I'm such a bummer sometimes folks, but with the nature of my work, I can't help it. Death is always around me, and I wouldn't be being true to myself if I didn't talk about it from time to time. I often think of myself as standing with one foot in the world of the living, and one in the world of the dead. Some days, those worlds merge for me, but most days, they are distinct and separate. It isn't easy on those whom I love, to have to deal with the weird hours I have to keep. It isn't easy on those who are in my life, knowing that I'm always on call, and may have to leave suddenly. It makes conversations difficult for me, with death almost always on my mind, and the conversation always ends up in some aspect of it around me.